Noticing people?

I read something the other day about sexism, and it got me thinking. As you go through life, you notice many things that get your attention. A nice sounding bird, a pretty sunset, a nice looking person, someone saying something really interesting, or funny.

All of these are considered ‘OK’, except for the nice looking person. If you see one of those you should ignore it. This is a bit odd I think. Physical looks and intelligence are both accidents of birth, why is it OK to value one but not the other? Is it ‘intelligenceist’ to value someone for being smart?

The thing is that whatever first brings another person to our attention, that is just a fleeting moment. From that moment forward, we can start to learn more about them, and discover that they have far more to offer than whatever it was that first made us notice them.

So if you’re the ‘noticer’, the important thing is not to get too wrapped up in the first feature you notice. Get to know the person more. And if you’re the ‘noticee’, then try to remember that the other person has just realised that you exist. Don’t assume that whatever brought you to their attention is all they see in you. Give them a chance to get to know you.

And of course there’s the other side. Don’t write people off because they don’t leap into your attention straight away, or don’t notice you straight away. Everyone has so much to offer. Be friendly, supportive, and give people a chance!